My Grief, Their Griefs

My friend's close friend just lost her husband yesterday. She has a baby and a toddler. I heard the news this morning. My heart suddenly bleeds. My memory took me back to the days following my own experience.

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First, it was the numbness. Everybody was busy taking care of all the arrangements. Everybody was pouring their hearts on us. Our house was crowded. Friends came over, bringing food, flowers, laughters, tears. It was like the holiday with a lot of tears.

Then the reality struck in. Everybody was back to their normal. Mine was abnormal.
Heartache. grief. anger. questions. tears. sleepless nights. loneliness.
It was painful. I admit it, I was jealous. How can their lives be normal while mine is not?

But God sent me friends, friends in grief

They continued to show up, day after day
in my front door, insisting to come in and just be there
in my mailboxes, sending thoughts and prayers day and night
they wanted to feel my pain and somehow ease some of it
they were willing to grieve with me
sometimes out of words
my grief was theirs
we bonded
we've been sharing journeys since then

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It's painful to see someone in pain
but we (widows and widowers) just need someone to be there
bare with us for awhile
talk to us
write to us
we love some visits too
you may let us know how you feel
it's ok to cry in front of us
it's delightful to hear you talk about your memory with our loved ones
you may babysit our kids once in a while because we get tired sometimes
text us in the middle of the night cause we might have some sleepless nights
follow you hearts

I am writing this on behalf of my fellow widows and widowers
I know how much you love us, friends
it is just sometimes you don't really know what to do
and I totally understand

For my friends in grief:
I can't thank God enough for sending you.
Thank you for sharing journeys with me.
Thank you for thinking about me and the kids.
Thank you for showing up here and there.
I love you all ....

For His Glory~